Wisdom Comes Suddenly

The Christmas Card Trifecta

December 15th, 2010 · 6 Comments

When I was a singleton, my good friend Resa and I would sit in my living room, with our spaghetti balanced on our laps, watching “Friends”, lamenting the many ways we might kill ourselves if we received one more joyfully exuberantly gleeful, cut out of cream cheese, family photo Christmas card.  Don’t say bitter…say…late bloomers.  But I digress.

Every year we swore we’d do a card.  Me, wearing my 800th bridesmaid dress, dancing like Elaine from Seinfeld with my beer flying through the air.  I never did it.  Instead, I joined the other team, spending the entire calendar year trying to capture that perfect moment with my family, all smiley, looking the same way, and well…CLEAN.  Resa, however, RESA took it to the next level.  She had the cajones to make all of our Carrie Bradshaw-like dreams come true.

In 2008, the Trifecta began, and I received this.  Quite possibly the greatest Christmas card every created:

I don’t care where you live.  A donkey on a Christmas card is funny.

Maybe you thought it was just a one-time thing.  It couldn’t be topped.  Guess again, because this was last year’s card:

That’s a donkey wearing Christmas lights.  Maybe I’m easy to amuse, but I laughed for a week.

This year, Resa found true love.  I didn’t know what to expect.  I had my beer and doritoes ready to pop open the moment her card arrived, as I look forward to it all year.  I dare not ask her the plan…I enjoy the suspense.  Today…TODAY was the DAY.  Resa does not disappoint, and I know for certain, this man was made for her:

Merry Christmas Resa and Tom.  Tom, it takes a strong man to tame a gal like Resa, but you’re just the guy to do it.  Plus, you have room for all of her horses.  And shoes.  Well, and she is in madly in love with you, so there’s that.

Tonight, Sara informed me she’ll be marrying a nice young man in her class, whom I think is just precious with his wavy brown hair.  When I asked her why, so matter-of-factly she replied, “Because he pushes me on the double-bike on the playground really fast, and at the end of every sentence he says ‘BURP!’”.  Which was met with ridiculous giggles from Kelly, followed by 15 minutes of the girls speaking non-sensical sentences, all ending in the word “BURRRPPP!”.

And Resa, it leaves me to wonder, maybe we just made it all too hard?  A guy with a sense of humor who is strong enough to push two kids on a big bike?  I mean seriously…what more could a gal wish for? Here’s to true love this Christmas season!


Tags: The Girls

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6 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Amie Settles // Dec 15, 2010 at 8:21 pm

    I can’t stop laughing. Reesa is the best!

  • 2 Andrea // Dec 15, 2010 at 9:54 pm

    Well, this post takes the cake and brings me out of my blog-reading silence! Hilarious!! I tend to have the same sense of humor that Reesa apparently does, but I think I would have had to edit my Christmas card list if I sent something like that out. However, I’m now disappointed that I’ve also recently found true love, as it means I wasted all my single Christmases sending out serious, newsy letters and cards. Hmm…..there’s one Christmas left…..

  • 3 Mrs Sharp // Dec 16, 2010 at 12:00 am

    OMG! Your friend is hilarious!

  • 4 The Momma // Dec 16, 2010 at 7:31 am

    Andrea, Don’t edit us off the funny list…we can take it! Good to hear from you. Make the last year count!

  • 5 Caren // Dec 16, 2010 at 9:23 am

    Ok, now that I am done peeing my pants!
    I LOVE it…and I can totally appreciate it—still looking for MY “ass!!”

  • 6 rachel stafford // Dec 17, 2010 at 12:36 pm

    Your friend IS hysterical, but I think way you wrote about it in your post is what had me on the floor. YOU ARE SO WITTY! I would have loved to have seen the Christmas card of you in your 800th wedding dress (with beer flying in the air, no less). Just the thought…

    I am also laughing because you and I BOTH made a reference to the show “Friends” while writing this week. Mine will be posted next week, but sadly, the last time I actually remember lying on the couch was when Friends still aired. Wow. I do have a “slowing down” problem, don’t I?

    Thanks for always bringing a smile to my face!