Parent/Teacher Conferences were last week.  Anyone who has heard the words asynchronous development, learning differences (the politically correct way of saying learning disorders, a phrase that never offended me in its original form), splintered learning, or split IQ, you know how wildly unpredictable a Parent Teacher Conference can be.  Basically, I have a child who can discuss abstract scientific concepts, but cannot add or subtract.  Honestly…you can give her buttons and tell her to take away buttons, and then take the buttons away for her as she stares blankly into space, and she still cannot answer the question.  She would prefer to ponder the similarities between art and science.  She deftly uses words like “reptilian” and “astounding” in sentences, but she cannot sound out the word “water”.  So here’s the thing: you gotta learn to add and read, no matter how long you can carry on an intelligent discussion about vertebrates.

After an hour of discussion with Sara’s phenomenal teacher and an extremely skilled administrator, it seems Sara needs a Math Tutor.  We walked out of the conference lighter than air.  We nearly high-fived each other.  We spent the day in our own giddy silence, just wanting to hug our existence.

What? You may be wondering…WHAT?  She’s failing Math, and you’re celebrating?  But Math is king!  Math is the key ingredient to a lucrative future!  Math is, well,  MATH.  I don’t disagree that Math is an extremely important subject, but let’s back up the clock to just 1 year ago today: Sara’s eyes couldn’t focus when looking down at a page.  She could barely form letters.  Using scissors was an Olympic feat of strength.  Sara was unaware that she had 2 sides to her body.  After a year of working with one of the best Pediatric Urology teams in the nation, she was still leaking urine almost every day. Let’s back it up 2 years ago: Sara had such severe emotional ups and downs that our Pediatrician was recommending a visit to a Psychiatrist.  In 4 years of life, she had never slept through the night.  Sara’s Pre-K teachers were starting to hint that they suspected something was amiss with her learning abilities.  After a year of being fully potty-trained she was leaking urine all day, every day. No one seemed to have a clue as to what was happening with her, especially us. Let’s back it up 3 years ago:  Sara was such a wreck that I quit my job to provide a more stable schedule for her.  Our home life was in total disarray.  We were miserable, even if we didn’t have the guts to say those words out loud.  We had no idea what was wrong or what to do about it.  We were so exhausted, if you had given us the answers in a magical jar, we wouldn’t have had the strength to unscrew the lid.

Now let me repeat myself: Sara needs a Math Tutor.  How you like them apples now?  Sara’s reading and handwriting are showing true progress, and if this pace continues, she’s on track to be proficient in both.  Sara has finally started to phonetically spell, after starting her first grade year spelling cat as “pYx”, or whatever 3 letters came to mind (let’s not even address randomly scattered upper and lower case letters).   Sara scored outstanding grades in Science, Social Studies, Art, Spanish, Computers, and Gym.  Her social skills are beyond that of an average 6 year old.  With the help of medicine and a vibrating watch, she has almost completely stopped leaking urine. She has tons of friends, and is fantastic at conflict resolution. Quite remarkably, she jumps out of bed every day, excited to go to school.  She is in a school full of people who adore and understand her.  Sara is so, very happy.

Last year, we were parenting the Dyspraxic, Convergence Disorder, possible ADHD, Learning Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Sensory Processing Disorder, Daytime Enuresis child.  Other than ADHD, we’d never heard of any of these things prior to 2010.  We go to doctors and therapists so specialized, I run into parents from other states every single time I’m in a waiting room.  So how many kids need a Math Tutor?  About a TRILLION.  How many Math Tutors are there?  About a TRILLION.  How good does it feel to have this HUGE part of our life become a manageable bubble that floats around us, as opposed to the definition of who we are?  It feels like a celebration!  Raise your glasses with me, my friends.  Your prayers have lifted us along the way.  Tonight we celebrate Sara’s “making minimal progress towards goal” in Math!  End of list (for now)!  Cheers!!