Wisdom Comes Suddenly

Christmas 2014

December 28th, 2014 · 1 Comment

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I hope you had a lovely Christmas. We spent 7 days in Northern Virginia with family, and while it was very busy, it was a lovely holiday indeed. We carried out our usual traditions: Candlelight service on Christmas Eve following a family dinner of Chicken and Dumpling soup, nights out with friends and family (sans le children! YES!), lunch at our favorite sushi joint in the mall because we never tire of mediocre sushi rolling by on a conveyor belt, play dates and parties with themes involving A LOT of sugar, family movie nights with 10 of us tucked in tight watching Hallmark Christmas movies and things like “Willow” (don’t ask me why we love this stuff), a trip to the theater on Christmas Day, sticky buns after presents, and OH MY GOODNESS…THE EATING. There was just so much of the eating, and I probably drank my body weight in champagne. It felt amazing.

I love the holiday season, but I’m not always a fan of the actual day of Christmas. It comes with expectations and phone calls from my family which almost never come. It comes with reminders that my “now” looks nothing like my “what once was”. Lonely memories are hard to bury, and when I look around at the beautiful decorations and warm homes full of people who seem to cherish my presence, I’m almost breathless at how lucky I am; how blessed I am. Every Christmas, the world asks me to walk one step further into the skin I now inhabit. It takes courage. It takes a willingness to embrace a life I don’t always understand. Sometimes I fear I’ve fallen into a picture, and just like in Mary Poppins, it will rain, and I’ll have to pop out again.

I’m not the only person with fleeting feelings of dissonance at the holidays. In fact, I think most of us are just trying to do our best to make worthy memories, no matter what our background or current circumstances. But if you are one of those people trying to forge a new story for yourself, this year, I want you to know you are not alone. Hope is everywhere. Love and family might be just around the corner. As I put away the decorations, I wondered, “What will my life look like this time next year?” It’s always so hard to say, but if it looks anything like right now, I will be the luckiest lady on earth. My cup runneth over.

Godspeed my dear friends. Godspeed.

Tags: The Girls

1 response so far ↓

  • 1 Lydia // Jan 2, 2015 at 11:07 pm

    I loved this post. It made me smile. 🙂