Mommy: Well Sara, I hope this week has taught you something about the consequences of lying.  Tell me, what have you learned?

Sara: Only trashy people lie, and they never get to listen to rock n’ roll in the car.

Mommy: Well, SO…um…yes.  Those are some things you could be taking away from this week.

Sara: Do I get my rock n’ roll back?

Mommy: Yes.

Sara: It could have been worse.

Mommy (using my very serious Mommy voice, trying to resurrect the spirit of Pa Ingalls): What could possibly be worse than lying?

Sara: Melanoma.

Mommy: Wha….um, well yes Sara.  YES, Melanoma is worse than lying.  (Oh Good Lord, really?  She played the cancer card?  I’m officially too dumb to parent.)

{Note to self: Be sure to teach Sara the difference between a VIRTUE and a DISEASE STATE.}