How do you know Christmas is coming?  Is it by the decorations at the stores?  The ads in the Sunday paper?  The commercials for the holiday films?  At our house, we know the holidays are upon us when it’s time to CUT THE RIBBON for the Gifts War. You’d think 3 years after chairing this event, I’d let it go, but cutting the 1500-ish strands of ribbon for the school Santa Shop has become a Feat of Strength for us.  We TIME ourselves. We challenge Greg to create new and better cutting systems.  And THIS…this was our year.

First, Chief Operating Officer Greg set up an all-spool device.  He’s loyal to the dining room chairs and his dowel rods, so I was uncertain as to how we’d knock off time with last year’s mechanics:

Second, he created the cutting station:

Yes, yes…far less tangle-y than last year.  You can see how the spacing of his uprights allow for the strands to be cut at the exact same length (we cut in the middle with large scissors). This year, he was especially expedient with his wrapping, had less stray ribbon dropping, and knew exactly where he wanted the Scissor Master to intervene (that’s me…I’m only in charge of scissors.  It’s best for everyone involved.).  I saw the hour finish line from last year being significantly cut at this point.  But the better uprights weren’t the clincher.  We were blind to our ace(s) in the hole, but luckily, these engineers know when to jump into a fray:

Yep, messy kids on a Sunday afternoon, layered in old sweats and unbrushed hair, threw themselves into the game.  With their capable hands guiding the ribbon through the uniting machine (you may call this device a “chair”), we hit an all-time record: TWENTY MINUTES!!  We cut almost 2000 strands in 20 minutes.  It’s official: The Christmas Season Has Arrived!!

*If you’re wondering if I’ll do the windows again, the answer is, yes, if the Chairwoman is OK with me puking paper and fake snow all over her event. She seems cool with my crazy so far!*